"Pete, please explain to me why I am having this queer gathering for Ted and Mel."

"Hello--collectively both girls have worked for you twenty-years, Char."

"Mel and Ted are girls?"

"Yes, Charlotte, Mel, and Ted are girls."

"All these years I thought they were masculine gay men."

"They are lesbians, Char, you know that."

The alleged Vincent Diamond (vincentdiamond.com) is a Central Florida writer who once drove from Tampa to Anchorage, Alaska in the days before the Alcan Highway was paved. Once. Like many writers, Diamond has had an odd assortment of day jobs that included being an inventory auditor, a pet sitter, a graduate student in Criminology, and a data entry drone. For the past few years, Diamond has written, edited, and proofread for various publishers. Time away from the keyboard is spent trying to pick up the correct diagonal at the trot, collecting caladiums, and pondering the beauty of tigers.

When asked about her husband's reputation for "womanizing," the painter, Freida Kahlo responded,

"Does a riverbank suffer for letting the river run?"

Marsha Stevens is a lesbian Christian singer, who met her partner, Cindy at church, after a long struggle to reclaim her life because she lost everything when she came out as a lesbian to the Christian community.